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10/03/01

Bush speech mix-up startles students

 

by Victor Payan

Pocho School Desk

In an embarrassing blunder, President-neglect George W. Bush accidentally switched a speech he had prepared for Congress with the text for his talk to first graders at a Washington DC elementary school today. The mix-up sent audible ripples of concern throughout the first grade class, while many Congressmen were touched by the President's impassioned reading of "The Cat in the Hat."

In Bush's talk at Richard M. Nixon Elementary School, the first graders were told that they would have to make some tough decisions in the near future, that they must be prepared to give up their freedoms in order to defend them, and that it was up to them to bail out the major airline corporations.

Meanwhile, Bush told members of Congress that they should respect the differences of others, learn to pay attention more, and focus on improving their math and reading skills. They were then given milk and cookies and dismissed for nap time.

Ironically, it was the first graders who noticed the mix-up, asking Bush hard-hitting questions about his family's alleged ties to the Bin Laden family, Pakistan's nuclear testing and human rights violations and America's funding and arming of the Taliban during the Russian invasion of Afghanistan.

The escalation towards war with Afghanistan was a key topic in Bush's discussion with the first graders. One student asked the President-neglect the barbed question, "War, what is it good for?"

Bush smirked and laughed smugly then quipped, "It's the economy, stupid."

The student was then escorted out of the class by Secret Service men and held for questioning.

On a lighter note, Bush was asked what he thought of the Three "R's".

"I have always been fond of ridin', ropin' and ranglin'," replied Bush, before smirking and laughing smugly.

The President-neglect concluded his talk to the first graders by urging them to approve widespread domestic wire-tapping measures, unlimited military expenditures and severe limitations on the press before breaking for their afternoon recess.

Members of Congress were unavailable for comment, due to today's extension of Congressional nap time.

© 2001 Victor Payan

Please read more about Pakistan's Blashemy Laws, police brutality and human rights violations against minorities, refugees, women and children at http://www.amnestyusa.org/countries/pakistan/

To read about the Bush family's business ties to the Bin Laden family, please visit Judicial Watch or read the 9/28/01 Wall Street Journal article: "Bin Laden Family Could Profit From a Jump In Defense Spending Due to Ties to U.S. Bank."