2001

03/29/01

CA Consumers reverse power charges

 02/23/01

Evidence suggests Bush trip to Mexico was faked  

01/31/01

Bush to recognize ruthless Taliban as "faith-based organization"

 01/14/01

Gulf War anniversary arrives amid radiation controversy

 01/09/01

Bush defends Labor Secretary choice

2000

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04/30/01

	THE WORST HUNDRED DAYS Bush sets presidential record for reneging on campaign promises
President-neglect Bush gives a shout out to the devil for a successful first 100 days in office.

 

by Victor Payan

Pocho Political Pundit

In a political coup de foie gras that will become known in the history books as the "Raw Deal," President-neglect George W. Bush has shocked pundits and political analysts by reneging on all of his campaign promises within the first 100 days since he and Vice President Dick Cheney seized office in January. Bush narrowly beat out his father, George Bush Sr., the previous record-holder, who took a full 102 days to break all of his campaign promises back in 1989.

In what is being referred to as the "Worst Hundred Days," Bush has presided over dramatic reversals of longstanding environmental safeguards, attacks on abortion rights and the separation of church and state, unchecked increases in gas and electricity prices, major economic downturns, massive lay-offs, police-induced riots on university campuses, embarrassing military blunders and terrible peacetime incidents of friendly fire.

In addition, Bush has also brought the United States closer to open military conflict with China, Japan, Colombia, Israel, Russia, Iraq, Canada and Liechtenstein. On a positive note, due to his many press conferences, the President-neglect is now reading at the tenth grade level.

The most glaring broken promise, however, has been Bush's vow to restore integrity to the Oval Office. Because of his controversial cabinet appointments, blathering doublespeak, coddling of the rich and fast-tracking of policy that favors corporate plundering of America's resources, critics are referring to the Bush White House as "Scamalot."

The benchmark of measuring the first 100 days of a new presidency dates back to the 1933 administration of Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who introduced sweeping New Deal legislation designed to help the common American, whom Roosevelt referred to as the "forgotten man." The only real significance, however, is that the 90-day presidential warranty has now officially expired.

Beaming about the speed and voracity of his actions, Bush told reporters, "I am like FDR on wheels."

Bush celebrated the milestone by taking his daughter Jenna to TGIFs for shots of Jaegermeister, while Vice President Dick Cheney marked the occasion in a private ceremony by sacrificing a goat to the devil while playing "Stairway to Heaven" backwards.

©2001 Victor Payan

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