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Home |
08/30/99
Vicente Fernandez to open mariachi-themed
casino in Las Vegas
 by Victor Payan
Pocho Business Charrospondent
Las Vegas - Mexican recording legend Vicente Fernandez held a press conference
recently to announce his plans for opening a mariachi-themed casino in Las
Vegas. Designed to cash in on the immense popularity of such large scale
theme casinos as "New York, New York," Fernandez said he expects
to open his casino, which will be called "Guadalajara, Guadalajara,"
by the end of the year.
The casino, which will be shaped like a giant cactus, will feature a miniature
Rancho Grande, live charreadas, rooster fights, fandangos and hourly displays
of bravado and machismo.
A full-scale Plaza Garibaldi buffet room is also
planned, where patrons can enjoy such traditional Mexican delicacies as
jalapeño poppers, fried chicken strips and tapioca pudding while
being serenaded by Pedro Infante, Javier Solis and Miguel Aceves Mejia impersonators.
Live entertainment will be provided by Fernandez himself or one of his many
famous sons, and popular television psychic Walter Mercado will also have
a regular floor show, billing himself as the Mariachi Liberace.
According to Fernandez, "Guadalajara, Guadalajara" will be designed
to give the large expatriate Mexican population in the United States a chance
to revisit old Mexico without jeopardizing the terms of their amnesty. It
will also give anglo Americans a chance to experience the wonders of their
friendly neighbor to the south without actually having to go there. To further
expand on the authenticity of the concept, Fernandez says he plans to model
the men's restrooms after poorly lit Tijuana sidestreets.
The hotel rooms will be 3/4 size replicas of rooms
in Fernandez's own lavish haciendas, and the honeymoon suite will feature
Fernandez himself showing up at random to sing popular ballads and provide
hands-on instruction regarding the Mexican art of deflowering.
To further immerse visitors in the Mexico experience, patrons will be required
to exchange their dollars for pesos at brightly-colored casas de cambio
before wagering on rooster fights, knife fights or before playing one of
the many one-armed bandidos at a game of blackjack. This worries members
of the Nevada Gaming Commission, who claim the wildly fluctuating peso exchange
rate will cause confusion among even the most skilled gamblers. But Fernandez
insists that the decision to use Mexican currency is designed to provide
as authentic an experience as possible so that visitors will feel that they
are truly south of the border.
"We want Americanos to have a chance of realizing the American dream
in Mexico. And we want them to do it in pesos," says Fernandez. "And
when they sit at the loteria tables, they will be using Mexican beans."
The mariachi superstar added that the peso is the ideal currency for a Las
Vegas casino, adding "Wherever pesos are involved, it is always a gamble."
Fernandez hopes "Guadalajara, Guadalajara" will be a hit with
Las Vegas' core visitor demographic group of bitter retired white people.
To guarantee that patrons will have an enjoyable visit, all prospective
employees will undergo extensive background checks to ensure that they are
not former Mexico City police officers, dangerous ear-cutting kidnappers,
or relatives of ex- Mexican president Carlos Salinas de Gortari.
© 1999 Victor Payan |
